If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Sext me about skeletons
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
