she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
