I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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