I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
the day after is always just damage control
I love having hate sex.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
