You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Can i not drive my cunt home
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
