he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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