clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We left the knife in your bed.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
