Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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