so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
