Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
