Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
