So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
