help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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