My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
