idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I'm having to shit out rocks
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