I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
