normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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