Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
