Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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