There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
