I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
