It was confusing and full of hummus
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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