We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
