I just threw up on my dentist
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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