I love black thongs
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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