he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i came on her dog
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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