i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
