i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
