We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize