Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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