You're so nebulous sometimes
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
of course. lets lasso hookers.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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