Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Sry I called you an 8
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
