Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
