If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize