SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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