I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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