CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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