woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
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