if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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