I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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