Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
