can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
