You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize