yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
