I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize