I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
