I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
