at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
