Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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