You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
