I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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