You can't special order awesome
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize